If your going to ride my ass, at least pull my hair! Interest peaked? I saw this statement on a license plate frame after eating lunch with a couple of my business partners last week. My first thought was, of course, she probably looks like Sandra Bullock, my second thought, yeaq, totally could visualize the whole act! Me and Sandra, I always knew she loved me and that those restraining orders were just some kind of foreign fore play. But maybe I should get to the point.
False advertising sucks! You know what the hair pullee really looked like. I won't even go there, except to say this: DO NOT DO THAT! Don't put something on your car that's going to put me through that whole thing. Do not put a license plate frame on your car that says Hot, Luscious or Juicy if you are not indeed one of the a fore mentioned. Really, on my way to the nap factory where I work occasionally, one morning I saw a license plate frame on a cute little sports car which read: ONE LUSCIOUS LADY! Bull shit! I could have received a $ 1,000.00 speeding ticket, just to catch up and find a 600lb one toothed gorilla eating, I shit you not, a cheeseburger from each hand. Never a grenade launcher around when you need one.
Lastly, to the guy at the hot dog stand at the little street faire thingy, if you don't want me staring at your wife's totally hot ass, please throw away all of those cute little pants that say things like, please come fuck me hard Mike. O.K., so not every pair say exactly that. However, most of the ones I've seen on women not shopping at Wal Mart, say exactly that.
Please no more false advertising. Unless of course, you actually are, Hot, Wet, Pink, Juicy, Ready and Willing. In that case, you should take two glasses of tequila and call me immediately!
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6 comments:
I must say... you are a complete work, I always knew guys thought like that but now you put it into words!
I do have to agree with you about the false advertisment. So may time I see women with the stupid license plates that you have to slow down to read.. Then they sre so stupid that you can't figure it out, and you rack your brain trying to find out the Kim love's her dog. I don't give a fuck about her dog!!! Why the hell does her think anyone else would??
I think that we should put people's cell numbers on the license plate that way I can call them and say "Good morning... NOW speed the fuck up, and get the hell off the phone!!
What, your not going to reply to my comment... Whats up with that!! Talk about me not responding on my post...
my very favorite license plate frame, ever, is "my other ride's, your mom."
this chick i knew shortly after school had that. she rocked.
oh and i saw here at a violent femmes concert a couple of years ago.
she has a girlfriend now. go figure.
Wow, it always winds up being about a girl.
that's O.K., Bob, I love pussy too! why I used to have a cat named....
Pussy Galore?
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